the game77 theory: an htp original !!!

y'know what drives me crazy ? stats that don't matter.

while i'm interested in hockey statistics in general (like the stuff that got me to third in my fantasy pool like G/A/PIM/SOG/Sv%), and i'm HUGE proponent of advanced metrics (corsi, qualcomp, zonestarts etc --all definitions can be found c/o behindthenet), when you watch a hockey broadcast or read pregames in the MSM, they often toss around meaningless numbers that make me want to throw things.

the one that comes to mind immediately is that the flames haven't won a game in anaheim since january 2004. that's a lot of losses, admittedly, but let's also consider that the only players who have endured the entirety of that dry spell were iginla and regehr. on the night of december 10th, 2010, when the flames rolled into the pond and every sportscaster in the universe was announcing the aforementioned seven-year win drought, mikael backlund's record in anaheim was a perfect zero-for-zero. brendan morrison's record in anaheim, whilst displaying a flaming C on the front of his jersey, was also unblemished.... as were babchuk's and kostopolous'. ultimately, the 2010 incarnation of the calgary flames had never played in anaheim as a group, and therefore (to me, anyways) the factoid is rendered meaningless...

in effort to show how thoroughly inconsequential some of these media-regurgitated items are, i came up with the game77 theory. i intend to use it as a retort to peter loubardias proving to the world that he can read the game notes, and therefore is aware that miikka kiprusoff is undefeated in the month of september against teams that wear green (or something equally insignificant).

cause here's the thing: the flames have won game 77 every year since 2000-2001... that's like 9 straight years !!! so this obviously means that they'll probably win game 77 next year, and that prospect clearly makes the data thoroughly important for mass consumption. OR, the flames are about as likely to win game 77 as they are game 76, and even mentioning the nine year run is sortof foolish...

these are the things i do when i'm bored.
see here for the actual data (and if you can't read it, i can email you a bigger version).
:)

separated at birth: mmm... sweeedes...

i saw the photo at left of alexander skarsgård (from true blood) and it reminded me instantly of the forsberg shot at right.

thought i'd share.

on the canucks winning the cup

there.
i said it.
i've been quietly saying it for weeks now, but there is no point pretending it's going to play out any other way (though i'll be more than happy to be wrong !!): the hated rival vancouver canucks are going to win the 2011 stanley cup.

but here's why it upsets me the most: i don't like canucks fans. i used to say "i don't like canucks fans... save for the select few of my pals who are NOT bullies about it and THOSE guys are AWESOME and i'm honestly happy for them," when the orcas won.... but then there was that one night where that one friend said some unnecessarily vicious and deplorable words following my congratulatory message post-OT victory v. chicago... and everything changed.

i hardly slept that night.
i kept waking up with his comments in my head and i couldn't believe they were ever even imagined, much less stated, by such an upstanding dude... amazing what a few too many pints and a first round victory can do... (apologies have since been offered and accepted, cause i know he's an incredible guy, but i fear there will always be lingering sadness, on my part, that the incident even occurred).

so here are the ground rules. let's try to follow them, mmkay ?

1. flames fans and canucks fans will never agree on things NHL, so let's acknowledge that we are and will always be enemies and move on.

2. FRIENDLY gloating/ribbing/goading is allowed, VICIOUS gloating/ribbing/goading (such as that which appears on theo fleury's twitter) is embarassing and reprehensible. nobody needs to make fun of sexual abuse, child abuse, or drug/alcohol abuse (EVER, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES), and straight up: nobody likes a braggart....

3. jealousy will occur naturally and unabashedly when one's hated rival is on the brink of a championship. let's just be respectful about it.

4. the canucks are going to win the cup. it's inevitable. i think we can all agree on this, so let's allow our canuck fan friends to be HUMBLY proud (almost lost in R1G7OT), and excessively happy. we, as flames fans, can sit back and dream about tim erixon and max reinhart....

5. canada's team IS team canada.

i remember when the flames beat the canucks in the '04 playoffs, 1st round, OT (i skipped the pixies live show at mac hall to watch game 7). my reaction to the massive victory wasn't "screw you canucks fans !" it was "OMG i'm SO excited, let's go somewhere i can take my shirt off and spend 45 minutes driving a single block !!!"**

good ? yeah ? now let's just all get along, shall we ?
#gobolts.
:)

**i'm paraphrasing cause i don't remember my exact thoughts, but it was something along that line i'm sure cause that's what some girls did.... more likely i was just repeating "HOLY SHIT WE FUCKING WON !!!" over & over in a trance-like state.

i guess the green men took the night off

screengrabbed by htp buddy and steinberg bff, mitthands, during the broadcast of last night's disaster on ice (aka: game 2). uncensored version here. bummer you can't see the look on ben eager's face....

this post is for you, domebeers. ;)

monday randoms (it's been awhile)

every year around this time, FFWD magazine polls calgarians about their favorite stuff, later published as their "best of" awards. please go to ffwd's website to have your say, but here's some stuff i submitted (cause i like a theme).




ps: alex ruiz only narrowly won "sexiest woman," because i don't find matt stajan that sexy.
pps: i just wrote "matt shatjan" by accident. hilarious typo.
ppps: i entered domebeers over my own blog cause it was the only way to appease AZR for me writing "loubardias" in as the local tv personality (which was a jab, but seemed like a vicious-roundhouse-to-the-head type jab).

:)

lunch and other tasty morsels for STH's

first of all, i want to apologize personally to ken king on behalf of myself and my bloggy colleagues from hitthepost who attended the season ticket holder's luncheon today and didn't speak up when asked "is there a blogger in the house ?".... people who have met me know that i'm super personable and easygoing, but in a room full of strangers i get painfully self conscious and ridiculously uncomfortable speaking out (the exception to this rule: karaoke'ing kriskross 'jump'...).

put it this way: my alias isn't walkinvisible for nothing.... but i digress

i will also point out to the masses that i don't believe we would've been persecuted by the org for being nerdy bloggers... unless a rep from domebeers had infiltrated the bowels of the 'dome on an offseason wednesday afternoon. part of me thinks kk wanted to know what a real-life blogger looks like (and part of me thinks he'd know exactly which of the 50-or-so folks we were), but he suggested that he was just curious how fast the following information would spread to the world:

there is a chance that the flames will purchase the calgary roughnecks lacrosse team.

[ps: ken ? if you're reading ? feel free to contact me at walkinvisible@gmail.com ---i'd love to talk to you about having a fulltime flames' blogger/tweeter. i write good reports and would even promise to not swear and i'd TOTALLY use caps] ;)

onwards.

here are some other things kk touched on, in the order of (my) interest:

1. COACHING STAFF
he talked about the coaching staff evaluations, and how it led to the dismissal of mcgill, cookson, and ("uhhhhhhhh....." king's eyes close... hand goes to forhead....looks to rollie cyr for assistance...) McLENNAN. sorry to say it, noodles, but the org president forgot your name for a sec. OR, alternately, refers to you so often as "noodles" that he couldn't remember your REAL name in a formal setting.... anyhow. not much info on gilly but it sounds like cookson lost his job to some tech savvy "consultant" who will be much better at operating the new fandangled video playback equipment. also, according to king, cookson wants to be an "on-ice" coach so the non-renewal of contract (aka: firing) is really in his best interest... as for mclennan, he was offered another unnamed position with the org that king suggests is not a demotion. i was gonna inquire about it but he probably wouldn't have told us anyways since he touched on the subject in his pre-emptive opening monologue. he did, however, offer the info that noodles has until "the end of the week" to make a decision on the offer. ie: two more days. [my feeling ? he's gone.... and i'm TERRIFIED he'll resurface in vancouver... ] king also noted that they wanted a bigger "veteran coaching presence" behind the bench, which hopefully means it no longer applies to the players. my fingers are crossed for the hiring of former AHL affiliate, lowell loch monsters, assistant tom rowe. natch. ;)

2. FRONT OFFICE
as far as announcing feaster as the official GM of the team, well ---don't hold your breath. they are still "going through the process" to ensure the "right fit." from the sounds of it, they want to announce the "package" in the front office all at once and are still filling in the gaps (this may also include coaching, that was unclear). kk DID suggest that feaster was currently in abbotsford reviewing things there, and that they were allowing him to choose his own people ---such as asst. GM--- which leads me to believe the "acting" title is in name only. i think it's fair to say it's been decided that this is the guy that will run the flames' future. hmph.... king said nothing about his own position, though i don't recall him having "CEO" after "president" in his job title before...?

3. UFAs
we were told that offers are out to "more than one" of the UFA players, and that they "want to sign" tangs, glenX & pardy, and that they "like" babs, karlsson & *gasp*staios ---for the right price. he went on about how much the org believes in karlsson & thinks he can take on 22 or-so games, and he also discussed glenny's deal; noting that 29% of his output came during 13 games. while that stat is interesting, more notable is the fact that the org is AWARE of this stat, and the presumption that they're using it to lower glenny's worth. [my feeling ? he's gone.... and i'm TERRIFIED he'll resurface in vancouver... lol]. king admits to the club (*cough*darryl*cough*) having overpaid some contracts, but doesn't mention bouwmeester, stajan, jokinen, bourque, sarich, hagman, kotalik, staios, or ivanans directly. ;)

4. ROOKIES
using the classic businessman runaround model, kk suggests something to the effect of "just because we have room for young players doesn't mean we will have young players on our team." he did seem positive, however, about erixon and brodie, and mentioned them plus nemisz and bouma as the four frontrunners in this capacity. he also suggested "a couple others," though i can't imagine who he's thinking of, unless they feel they want to give jon rheault an actual contract, they're wanting to skip max reinhart straight from the dub, or he's forgotten keith aulie got traded to the leafs for a sack of pucks.

OTHER GEMS:
- they're looking at alternate urban sites for a new arena. places they're looking ? "to the north, uhhh, east, and south.... and west." lol. best quote of the day. ;)
- the salary cap should go up next year "by the cost of one of our UFA's salary." obviously that is massively different if we're talking pardy or tanguay but some maths thrown around were "57% of the total of the new USA tv deal divided by 10." or something equally perfectly clear.
- the next new 3rd jersey will be in three years at the earliest
- they're raising the price of beer by 25cents and will experiment with bottom to top pour technology.
- the team will not be going back to PPVs (sorry, nybo) based on inferior production quality.
- coaches grade the players after every game on a 0-5 type scale, and then there was something about these numbers being plotted on a grid. inneresting.
- conny's fitting in "like a glove" in the front office. sounds like he's going hockey ops direction, is a good player-to-mgmt 'go-between,' is dabbling in player scouting, and even looking into puck technology. no doubt doing it all with that big ol' conroy smile on. ;)
- the flames foundation is returning appx 2 mil/yr to the community. kk seemed very excited about a new project that will be announced sometime in the next year or so.
- asked when they're retiring #14, kk suggested the org is moving away from jersey retirement and towards more acknoledgement-type ceremonies. ie: iggy will get retired and fleury won't. that ticks me off.
- per game playoff revenue (lost) is "north of a million, south of two."
- kk discussed traffic concerns around the 'dome on gamenights and revealed the org has hired a traffic consultant to help make improvements. he wouldn't, however, go into detail because "if it doesn't work, we'll look like idiots."

...kindof like the 10/11 season, hunh fellas ?

The Ugliest Shoes Ever.

So in an another episode of Flames fandom gone wild, I would like to introduce all of you to the ugliest shoes ever. But just because they are ugly, does not mean they are not absolutely badass. For many years, I never thought I could top the gem of a find I had found at the Puma Store on Newbury Street in Boston, circa 2006...the Puma RS 100 Gold Rush...

.

Those shoes epitomized a golden era of Flames hockey and have been my go to Flames games kicks since AND you could wear them in public without coming off too flash. Yes, I wore them at the Heritage Classic too...which was not a super good idea cause I froze my feet in the process...but I represented, right?

Well I've topped the Pumas, I kid you not. And it wasn't really a find...I designed them myself on Converse's website and their creation is practically legendary. I have to credit Newsboy aka James Callsen of Calgary's X92.9 FM for informing me of the ability to design the shoes at Converse, so he definitely gets a high five for helping bring these masterpieces to life. For many years I had tried to create some Flames Nike Shox on Nike ID without much success. It was just too hard to capture the spirit of the classic NHL fan gear I was trying to create. The low top Chuck T's gave me the opportunity to capture all the glory of the NHL in the 1980s while remaining elegantly tacky. It is for this reason that while I contemplated including some black (which is a color in the Flames current color scheme) as a component of the shoe, but black did not make the final cut. In honor of the Flames bringing back the retro jerseys in recent seasons, the shoes' color scheme is straight throwback. Additionally, the shoes had to evoke the essence of the Magic Man....Joel Otto...the 86 Cup Run...and the 89 Stanley Cup. Honestly the only thing missing with these shoes is a mullet or a porn-stache. Truth be told, if these shoes existed back in the 80s, someone on the set of the "Red Hot" music video would have been wearing them.

With that said, it really takes a hockey enthusiast, and not just any Flames fan, to see magnificence instead of just an ugly ass pair of shoes. Hence the reason my girlfriend, a Flames fan, gasped in horror and exclaimed "Ronald McDonald called and wants his shoes back!" when she saw them. So if you're reading this blog, I am sure you are going to appreciate the pictures below. If you don't, this is probably your first time at htp or you are just an Oilers or Canucks fan looking to troll a Flames site...because a reader of this blog will just stare in amazement at the following...

Yep...they are ugly...and they say Go Flames Go on the side...but they are definitely #winning.

the real hat trick

it's kinda hard to see in this half-assed iphone photo, but here's the background story:

there's a guy (who's name is ryan, if i remember correctly) who has seasons tickets in the bleeders on the east side of the 'dome by the pressbox. a few of the times i've met steinberg pre-game to say "hey," this guy has passed us heading to his seats and he's stopped to say hello. so here's the kicker: every single game he brings this $6.00 children's-sized dion phaneuf hat to throw in case of a hat trick. and he's been bringing it for eons.... "why ?" you ask ? cause a nice-looking, adult sized calgary flames hat costs upwards of twenty bucks !!!

anyhow, when iggy got his third last night, this was the VERY FIRST THING i thought about.

now that guy needs to go get a new tossing hat.
;)

fantasy pool factoids

in case you were interested: this guy in the featurette below went into the "playoff rounds" at #3 in my fantasy pool. i fought him the whole way during the season but ended #4. it ticked me off that the screaming dobermans (my team) lost position to the smelly terriers (his team).



funny and awesome.... if i can knock off #1 and he can take out #2, we'll meet in the finals next week. right now both series' are tilted 5-3 in favour of the higher seed. ie: not looking good. whatever ---last year the dobies came in 12th and the awesomely named graceland kings won the title.

so, either way, i'm stoked to have made it this far.

:)

fuck you, teemu

i absolutely adore teemu selanne and every single thing to do with his career, skills, and quirks.

having just scoured the vaults of hitthepost history, i am surprised that i never documented one of my alltime favorite hockey moments: when me and my boy strombo were realtime texting about how emotional we were when teemu finally hoisted the prize back in 07 (a win i reveled in ONLY because of the legendary finn).

how awesome is it that teemu was a schoolteacher in his pre-nhl years ? how incredible that he once got a $40,200.00 speeding ticket ? that he played for the winnipeg jets ? that he scored 76 goals in his rookie year and went duck hunting when he broke mike bossy's record at #54 ?!? that he races cars in the offseason (and that he races under the pseudonym teukka salama which "loosely translates as tommy lightning" ---from wikipedia ) ??!!!?

also ? i wouldn't even say he's good looking. i'd suggest he's truly handsome. ;)

anyhow, teemu is a fucking legend. full stop, without a doubt. and i love the guy. except here's the hitch: he's effin' FORTY ----more than halfway to 41----, and he's still pretty much singlehandedly sinking my team's chances at the 10/11 playoffs.

which deserves a big ol' middle finger, if you ask me... hopefully he gets this note and bows out gracefully tonight cause the flambés need this one in the win column in a crazy big way....

(watch getzlaf/perry get eighteen goals tonight now)

;)